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What is special about Vietnamese women?

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Vietnamese women are good-looking. Because the culture and geography of Vietnam have been influenced by both East Asian, Southeast Asian and just a dash of Western culture. Mixed blood are not uncommon in Vietnam and the authentic pure Vietnamese before Chinese influence are gorgeous too. If you go to Vietnam and check out the minority ethnic groups, they have an unusual loveliness to them that cannot easily be found in other parts of the world.

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In the rural mountains of Vietnam, more and more young girls disappear from their homes. Many of them crossed the border and were sold to the Chinese as wives for the price of a buffalo.

At eight in the evening, on a hot summer day, the quiet, timid girl Tien left the house and went to spend the night at his cousin's house. At least, the 16-year-old child told his family this way. In fact, because she didn't want to get married, she was planning to leave the village. I hope that her cousin will help her find a job, so she quietly slipped out of the house.

Almost two years later, when she came back here again, she had suffered a horror experience beyond the imagination of most young people. The cousin she trusted didn't find a job for her, but sold her to a trafficker who specialized in human trafficking to China, and he sold her as a "Vietnamese bride". Since then, Tien has become a member of that frustrating statistic: more and more poor Vietnamese girls are sold to China and forced to marry.

Tien realized early that something was wrong. "I gave him all the money and ID," Tien recalled. "He told me, 'We are going to find a job. Since you want to leave that village, I will take you away.'"

Her cousin had promised to take her to a big city in the south, but they flew north to Hanoi, the capital. They changed cars in the capital and Tien fell asleep. When she woke up, she was already in China, and her cousin abandoned her and sold her to a trafficker.

Soon, Tien learned that the trafficker had found her husband for her. Although a fierce conflict broke out with the trafficker, she refused to walk out of the trafficker's house for the next four months. In the end she succumbed because she met another Vietnamese. He told her that the only way to escape from this country was to learn Chinese, and the best way to learn was to get married. Tien accepted the suggestion and asked the trafficker to find a new husband for her.

Not a strange story

Tien ’s suffering is not unique. In some rural areas of Vietnam, disappearances like her are becoming more frequent. Many villagers believe that if a girl disappears for more than a few days, she must have reached the other side of the border.

According to official statistics from the Vietnam Police General Administration, between 2011 and 2017, there were 2,700 human trafficking cases involving nearly 6,000 victims, mainly from poor rural families, with little access to education or wealth. It is generally believed that the real numbers are far more than official statistics. Police said that in provinces near the Chinese border, the number of children selling as brides is also increasing, and more and more.

In China, among married young people, there are 34 million more men than women, which exceeds the total population of Malaysia. Based on this, some websites have introduced services for introducing foreign brides. The price of this service is usually around 10,000 yuan (1,500 US dollars).

The story behind the woman who becomes this bride is always subtle. Many people are tricked into China by false work commitments and better living conditions; others are deceived by people they trust, relatives or friends, and sometimes boyfriends who promise to marry them are sold to traffickers; some girls are Anesthetized, and then unknowingly crossed the border. They were eventually forced to marry, and some were even sold to brothels to become sex slaves.

There are also family members who hope to get a dowry to voluntarily hand over the girl to the traffickers (usually at a "lower price than buffalo", villagers say, generally between US $ 600 and US $ 2200), but finally found that their daughter Has been kidnapped and sold.

Once these women are married, various forces will plot them to stay in China. Some people are imprisoned by their newly-wed husbands, while others dare not return to the country because of shame because they often cannot get married again after returning to the country.

30-year-old Ma Thi Mai is a Hmong woman from the poor rural town of Sa Pa in northern Vietnam. She was sold by her boyfriend. "After my husband died, a man got my phone number from an acquaintance and contacted me," she recalled.

Soon they became obsessed with each other, or at least she thought so. In just two weeks, he took her away from home and took her to the terraces of Laojie to visit her hometown. Laojie is a border city at the junction of the two rivers, close to China. It is notorious for being a crossing point for human traffickers.

While they were crossing the river late at night on the raft, Ma Thi Mai did not know that they were entering another country. She has never been far from her hometown.

"I didn't know that this was China until I saw people who printed signboards with strange characters and spoke in different languages,"

Mai said. "He sold me to a Chinese woman, and then that woman sold me to other men."

Mai became a modern version of the slave. Along the way, she was sold and auctioned at least five times. If she rebelled or cried, angry men would threaten and beat her. "They sold me like selling animals," she said.

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My (Vietnamese) wife and I have known each other since 1970 when we served together, she was a USN civilian employee, I a Sailor in the USN. In 1971 we were married by Vietnamese custom and in 1973 officially married under American Law.

To me their isn’t much difference in people because of ethnicity. I really see little difference between Vietnamese women and American women.

What is different about us, is that my wife and I are “War Buddies.” But sadly, my now late wife, after 48 years of a happy marriage, died 21 July 2019.

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I beg to differ with the other two.

I will just compare Vietnamese women with majority of the women from my country. My wife is Vietnamese by the way.

Below are some of the most outstanding qualities of a typical Vietnamese (at the time of writing as values changes with time), to me:

Resilient

I do not know why, may be the men are all douche, but there are so many single mother in Vietnam! They have to pick up the burden of putting food on the food for the family, and taking care of the children.

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Vietnamese women, like many Asian women, are strong at heart.

We might be docile and sweet but at the end of the day, we do to any extent to protect our families and our environments.

For example, it’s so easy to see women working in fish markets and haggling to survive. Little did we know, she is from the countryside with two young kids waiting for her. These women still worked on struggle and taking care of their kids as much as possible.

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Vietnamese women are like diamonds. Diamonds are precious stones known for their combination of both beauty and brilliance, resilience and strength, and are formed under extreme pressure. So are Vietnamese women. Except their traits emerge during their struggle against the many social and economic challenges that they face in their daily lives. The result is something quite more stunning than a piece of jewelry. Instead, the product is a unique human being that is both hardworking and talented, has “grit”, is devoted to her family, is charming and beautiful, and good at managing money.

Hardworking and Talented

Somewhere along the line Vietnamese women learn the invaluable lesson that effort = intelligence. Maybe it’s the focus their parents place on education or maybe it’s the social pressure to achieve. Maybe it’s a byproduct of having so little in the way of economic resources that the only choice is to try harder. Whatever it is, Vietnamese girls learn at an early age that, if they want to succeed, they’ve got to put in the sweat-hours.

A typical school day in Vietnam is shorter than in America. However, the students are fully expected (and do) study on their own and with the help of their parents (usually their mother) at home. This sort of effort-based approach to learning allows people to develop their talents. Add on top of that a healthy dose of competitiveness in Vietnamese society and you get many extremely talented women that will not allow obstacles or setbacks to stop them from achieving their goals. I’ve got two cousins (both girls) that are in med-school. They grew up in a trailer park and, statistically have no business excelling like they did in their studies. Except they are 100% Vietnamese and that means they were armed with the sort of mindset and values that comes along with the Vietnamese culture.

Let me not forget, Vietnamese women are the best cooks. And I do mean the best. This comes partly from their talent and approach to learning and partly from the fact that Vietnam is a tropical region with many mouth-watering ingredients that grow like weeds do in my garden. Want to experience the best food in the world? Then go to Vietnam. Want the very next best thing? Then go to your Vietnamese girlfriend’s house when her family is having a party. Bún thịt nướng, phở, bánh mì, cơm, bánh xèo, gỏi cuốn, chả giò, thịt kho, cá chiên, canh …oh so many kinds of canh… the list just goes on and on.

Just to get your tastebuds to understand:

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(Bún thịt nướng chả giò)

Vietnamese Women Have Grit

Grit is a sort of mixture between toughness, courage, refusal to quit in the face of difficulty, and willingness to endure hardship when necessary. Vietnamese women have this in abundance. This is almost certainly due partly to their mindset, which they learn from an early age. But it is also partly due to the fact that they face incredible hardships in life that citizens of first world countries have typically never had to face. Up until 1995 the country was “closed” to the West. The economy was terrible which meant everyone was poor—like destitute poor. Babies were not born at hospitals but were born at the local midwife—just another lady that happened to be experienced in birthing; and no epidurals were not available. What if the mother didn’t produce enough milk for the child? There was no access to formula. The answer was rice water—I’ll explain for those throughout the world that do not know about rice. When you cook it, first you wash it. When you are washing it, cloudy-water comes off and this water has some amount of vitamins though it doesn’t have many calories. Not ideal, certainly, but it was all they had.

Another contributing factor is that Vietnamese men so often tend to be under-performers. Alcoholism is rampant. But, the again, men generally perform poorly under tyrannical regimes. The women are left in charge of the family, for all intents and purposes. I’ll revisit this later, but for now just know that Vietnamese women shoulder many a burden and, as such, have grown an uncommon resilience .

Now here’s something else to show you the character of Vietnamese women. They all ride motorbikes. You might think that’s no big deal, especially after realizing that the motorbikes are puny little 100cc or 150cc things, no real bikes like the bad boys ride. But there are things that need to be considered. Traffic is simply not the same in Vietnam as it is in the States. Cars, busses, and 18-wheelers will pull out in front of you, cut you off, merge into your lane forcing you to brake or to be run off the road, ride your tail honking incessantly if your in the center of your lane, and will use the slightest margin to nudge you out of their way, often passing within inches of your handlebars. Driving in Vietnam is dangerous and not for the weak-hearted.

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I took this picture by the way. This is not “in the city” but is a typical highway in Vietnam. Look at how these two ladies on their motorbikes are being passed on both sides simultaneously by two large trucks. Those trucks are perhaps a few feet in either direction from them and traveling at around 30–40 mph.

Here is another angle of the same intersection so you can have a better feel for what’s going on:

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Here is another intersection a little later:

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Notice how that truck turns in front of the other traffic forcing them to brake. General rule in Vietnam: motorcyclist beware. And this is something Vietnamese women face every single day.

But there’s more than just that. While other nation’s women may have the luxury of a car, Vietnamese women have to make do with their motorbikes. How do you take four kids somewhere on one motorbike? Or how do you carry a bunch of whatever you might need to carry? We have back seats and trunks and whatnot. Not so on a motorbike.

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This image I pulled from google. Trust me, it’s real. I see this kind of stuff everyday. Here is one I took from the safety of my car (I know I’m a hypocrite) of a woman making her daily morning commute to the market:

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So what’s the bottom line with all these pics of girls on motorbikes? Vietnamese women are tough as nails . They face situations on a daily basis that would cause grown men in other countries to mess their pants. But they’re more than that…

Vietnamese Women are Devoted to their Family

All women have that familial instinct, the one that drives them to protect and nurture their children and love their parents and siblings and extended family. But for Vietnamese women, this instinct is on overdrive. Vietnamese women protect their children. Of course they protect them from outside dangers but they also protect children from themselves . They know how to raise children to understand morality, duty, discipline, love and respect. Tongue lashings are quick and severe if a child misbehaves. And if the transgression is severe, a spanking is the immediate result. They absolutely love their children and are willing to endure the momentary pain that a parent experiences when disciplining their children because they know their children must be taught right from wrong and how to behave correctly.

At the same time, when they become the wife of a man they will care for him, work alongside him, support him in his endeavors, and act as a partner to help him support their family (as opposed to expecting him to do it all in his own). Vietnamese women are willing to work hard jobs, dirty jobs, or any job that will sport their family. I have seen women construction workers throwing stones right beside the men, women herding cattle, women driving trucks, women farmers (see pic) and of course all Americans know about the women VC that fought just as hard as them men did.

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I pulled this image from google again. This is backbreaking work and these women do it every season, year in and year out.

Yet there is something cultural about Vietnamese woman that other women typically don’t have. In southern Vietnam there has been a long tradition of strong women and women have historically had a more prominent role in society than in many other cultures. This could be a factor in creating such strong and robust women.

This could also be a factor in creating the dynamic that I see in Vietnamese culture, and that is the revolution of the family around the mother. It is true that children take the surname of the father, like in Western countries. However, I find it is typically the mother and her sisters to be the central core of the family. The keystone, if you will. Vietnamese women are family-centric. They will always put their family first.

Vietnamese Women are Charming and Beautiful

In my slightly biased opinion, Vietnamese women are the most beautiful women on Earth. Part of this is due to their amazing physical feature and part of it is due to their inherent charm. They are demure yet confident. Strong yet feminine. Bold yet respectful. They combine the allure of a purring cat with the prowess of a tiger. There are some 40-million Vietnamese women on Earth right now, and the 40-million men that get to marry them are the luckiest men alive.

As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words:

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Vietnamese girls are witty, seductive, joyful, and clever. They enjoy dating and can be both serious or playful. At the same time they have self-respect and won’t waste their time with losers.

Now tha

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Vietnamese women are those who dare to rise up to rebellion, fight foreign invaders, replace her husband to manage the kingdom when her husband goes to war, fidelity the stone statue waiting for her husband to return, typically Hai Ba Trung, Ba Trieu, queen Y Lan, mrs To Thi.

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If you don’t know I ain’t telling. you have to find out for your self. all I can say is WOW! If you ever get a chance find one and try it. Your going to have the surprise of your life. They ain’t like any other, except another Asian woman the way they were raised, there likes and dislikes are a lot different than other women. I’m going to stop now or I’ll get in trouble with my wife of 15 years.

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